10 Tips for A Successful Marriage | News | Loyola Medicine
Friday, September 18, 2015

Loyola psychologist offers 10 tips for a successful marriage

MAYWOOD, Ill.  – While all too many marriages end in divorce, many couples achieve long and happy unions.

Based on what he has learned during 35 years in the field, Loyola University Health System psychologist Michael Hakimi, PsyD, offers these 10 tips for achieving a successful marriage:

  1. Love your spouse unconditionally. Be generous in expressing your love, even when there is an issue. Always remember what attracted you to each other in the first place, and keep these feelings alive. In words and actions, make your spouse feel very special. Commit yourself 100 percent. 
  2. Communicate with kind words and compassion. Avoid harsh criticism and blaming. Never neglect to say “Thank you” and “I’m sorry.” Express gratitude and appreciation for any act of kindness, service or good will. Establish a relationship that is based on honesty and mutual respect. 
  3. Place the interests and welfare of your spouse above those of your own.
  4. Be faithful to your spouse, and make love as often as you both are in the mood.
  5. Provide for the needs of your spouse to the best of your ability.
  6. Listen carefully and try to understand what your spouse is saying.
  7. Take your spouse’s opinion into consideration before making any important decision.
  8. Work to overcome the undesirable traits in your own personality and behavior.
  9. Continually seek ways to become a better husband, wife or parent.
  10. Follow the Golden Rule: Treat your spouse the way you want to be treated.

Dr. Hakimi is an assistant professor in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Neurosciences of Loyola University Chicago Stritch School of Medicine.


About Loyola Medicine and Trinity Health

Loyola Medicine, a member of Trinity Health, is a quaternary care system based in the western suburbs of Chicago that includes Loyola University Medical Center (LUMC), Gottlieb Memorial Hospital, MacNeal Hospital and convenient locations offering primary and specialty care services from 1,877 physicians throughout Cook, Will and DuPage counties. LUMC is a 547-licensed-bed hospital in Maywood that includes the William G. and Mary A. Ryan Center for Heart & Vascular Medicine, the Cardinal Bernardin Cancer Center, a Level 1 trauma center, Illinois's largest burn center, a certified comprehensive stroke center and a children’s hospital. Having delivered compassionate care for over 50 years, Loyola also trains the next generation of caregivers through its teaching affiliation with Loyola University Chicago’s Stritch School of Medicine and Marcella Niehoff School of Nursing. Gottlieb is a 247-licensed-bed community hospital in Melrose Park with 150 physician offices, an adult day care program, the Gottlieb Center for Fitness, the Loyola Center for Metabolic Surgery and Bariatric Care and the Loyola Cancer Care & Research at the Marjorie G. Weinberg Cancer Center at Melrose Park. MacNeal Hospital is a 374-bed teaching hospital in Berwyn with advanced inpatient and outpatient medical, surgical and psychiatric services, advanced diagnostics and treatments. MacNeal has a 12-bed acute rehabilitation unit, a 25-bed inpatient skilled nursing facility, and a 68-bed behavioral health program and community clinics. MacNeal has provided quality, patient-centered care to the near west suburbs since 1919.

Trinity Health is one of the largest multi-institutional Catholic healthcare systems in the nation, serving diverse communities that include more than 30 million people across 22 states. Trinity Health includes 94 hospitals, as well as 109 continuing care locations that include PACE programs, senior living facilities and home care and hospice services. Its continuing care programs provide nearly 2.5 million visits annually. Based in Livonia, Mich., and with annual operating revenues of $18.3 billion and assets of $26.2 billion, the organization returns $1.1 billion to its communities annually in the form of charity care and other community benefit programs. Trinity employs about 133,000 colleagues, including 7,800 employed physicians and clinicians. Committed to those who are poor and underserved in its communities, Trinity is known for its focus on the country's aging population. As a single, unified ministry, the organization is the innovator of Senior Emergency Departments, the largest not-for-profit provider of home health care services—ranked by number of visits—in the nation, as well as the nation’s leading provider of PACE (Program of All Inclusive Care for the Elderly) based on the number of available programs.